Adolescence: Coming of Age

Adolescence: The ‘Donkey’ years- no offense meant to the Donkey; The Doldrums

Age at which we realize our parents know nothing.

Neither child nor adult

Age when we have our best of times & worst of times; we are critical of ourselves, rebel against our parents, assume responsibilities

Period of growth & development

Onset of puberty & related physical changes. Attraction for opposite sex. Guilty feelings over biological urges: need to handle one’s identity & acceptable heterosexual attitudes

Natural to have sexual feelings/ sensations. Loss of self-esteem/anxiety is common. Also in certain cases suicidal feelings as adolescents feel they are terrible people to have such feelings

May feel oversexed; to satisfy their curiosity, may fall into bad company/ read cheap literature

Parents need to explain normal phenomena

Breakfree

Need for independence due to wanting to be someone vs that expected by society (parents/ others)

Adjustment problems due to insecurities

in school/ with peers : acceptance

Parents: acceptance & love are for granted while respect is lacking : Generation Gap

The Experts say thus”

PARENTS

• Parents will have naturally genuine unconditional concern
• Parents to appreciate & recognize good behaviours
• Listen/ understand & be there for their adolescents
• Don’t be overcritical
• Be the role model & no double messaging

ADOLESCENTS

• Adolescents to maintain contact with family
• Keep parents informed on whereabout & activities
• Open minded to suggestions & criticisms
• Realistic plans without letting go of daydreaming/ imaginations
• Develop hobbies & interests
• Specific responsibilities