Conflict zones
Natural disasters, Transport accidents, Terrorism, Riots
Outside our experience: extreme events
Numb & dazed reactions
Intense & severe stress: Linked to flashback – keeps coming back
Panic attacks, anxiety, palpitation, irritability, anger
Guilty feelings on survival, sleep disturbances
Solace & support needed
Passive listening, helping around, medications ( prescribed only)
Internal resilience coping mechanism to be activated
Adolescence: The ‘Donkey’ years- no offense meant to the Donkey; The Doldrums
Age at which we realize our parents know nothing.
Neither child nor adult
Age when we have our best of times & worst of times; we are critical of ourselves, rebel against our parents, assume responsibilities
Period of growth & development
Onset of puberty & related physical changes. Attraction for opposite sex. Guilty feelings over biological urges: need to handle one’s identity & acceptable heterosexual attitudes
Natural to have sexual feelings/ sensations. Loss of self-esteem/anxiety is common. Also in certain cases suicidal feelings as adolescents feel they are terrible people to have such feelings
May feel oversexed; to satisfy their curiosity, may fall into bad company/ read cheap literature
Parents need to explain normal phenomena
Breakfree
Need for independence due to wanting to be someone vs that expected by society (parents/ others)
Adjustment problems due to insecurities
in school/ with peers : acceptance
Parents: acceptance & love are for granted while respect is lacking : Generation Gap
The Experts say thus”
PARENTS
ADOLESCENTS
Emotional problems of childhood
Normal reactions viz. anger, petulance, fighting leading to moods which persist then lead to sustained emotional reactions viz, fear, anxiety or depression
Stresses due to family interpersonal relations/ poverty/ school also the mental makeup i.e. how one takes things which can lead to ineffective coping
Same trauma can be responded by a different reaction (anxiety/ depression/ withdrawal/ aggression)
How such problems can reflect
Phobias include that of school.
Childrens can have depression too
Pains, Headaches just before any social function or going to school
Need to know the hidden fears/ anxieties
Bed wetting ( very common)
Attention deficit disorder
Behavioral techniques- rewards & verbal reinforcement
Reinfrocement
Developmental Disorders/ Delays
Delays in walking/ speaking: own unique pace of development
Can have biological basis viz. brain
Can be in form of specific learning disability (Writing/ reading/ math’s)
Such developmental delays can lead to isolation, withdrawal, aggression, lowered
Assessment of delays by tests on reading/ writing/ memory by trained persons to initiate timely interventions
Trained teachers can take care of developmental delays along with parental support
Children development happens in physical, mental & societal aspects with structured changes
Cognitive, moral, personal & emotional development
Development hampered by lack of Love/ neglected child, physical needs not met, family friction, child labour, abuse (physical/ emotional), extra strictness
Sibling rivalry is for real (can lead to low self-esteem)
School is also important for overall child growth
Child grows socially & emotionally in company of other kids
Healthy interaction between student / teacher, teacher acts a facilitator
Parents do the needful (some of it goes without saying)
With right atmosphere (physical & psychological) child develops into self-sufficient, caring, emotionally stable adult able to reach full potential
Self worth judgement based on marks/ scholastic achievements can lead to pressures on childs mind
Overall aim of competition: learning at age appropriate levels & giving your best
Delayed learning/ intellectual development
Learning Disabilities/ Dyslexia: able to understand concept but not able to reproduce
Hyperactivity: Overactive kids
Depends on level of attention/ duration of concentration
Lack of empathy by peers leads to isolation & aversion to school/ studies
Elders need to provide a warm atmosphere at home & help child with schoolwork
Family atmosphere & interpersonal relationships at home are important factors which count towards sense of achievement & normal development
Stresses & unhappy atmosphere at home contribute to scholastic backwardness
Neglected child/ marital conflict/ Parental deprivation can lead to anxiety
Too much expectations without appreciation of emotions of child: acceptance of child’s individuality, appreciating child & valuing child for what he/ she is
Never compare as the saying about all fingers not being equal exemplifies
Child & performance are separate; Only encourage never compare otherwise inferiority complex
All directions are open , there are many aspects to a person- he/she can make a mark in any of them
Unstinted encouragement of child’s creative potential will unlock their powers & motivate them.
Marital disharmony or bliss
& they lived happily ever after… yeah sure
It can & does work out for many people but for others it’s a rocky ride
Ideally; Partners are Co-operative, helpful, understanding, caring & sharing,
In reality: Interpersonal stresses, Work Pressures, Respective In laws, Monetary stresses, Unshared responsibilities, Roles supposed to be played by each partner & their reversal in todays society, Egos, Letting off steam at home on family
How to Guide for happy marriage (You Wish..)
#JustSaying
As I write this went back & all the memories came back; It seems like homeopathic symptoms list – all seem to be applicable to my marriage
Though taking heart from the fact that all are on same boat
Also if taking a holistic view – all are small & nagging issues which may not be entirely justified
Divorce rates increasing (compatibility, roles expectations, individualistic lives, less communication, lack of trust, perceptions)
Children are vulnerable in such transactions of Walking out of a marriage, then divorce
Signs of a troubled marriage
The “ wise” say thus:
@KabirKadian Spoke on #WasteManagement at Ambala Capacity Building on Waste Management Rules for stakeholders #plasticwaste Guided by Hon'ble PM @narendramodi vision of #singleuseplastic free India & support #SHS2019 #BeatPlasticPollution
One Stop Solution to many Physical & Mental issues: Good Sleep
Least cost + very effective method
Nowadays in our connected lives we are constantly bombarded with content on TV, SM, Mobiles, fast paced life, stresses due to work life imbalances; can lead to sleep deprivation
Sleep Deprivation: we all know something is not right- lack of attention/ co-ordination/ Irritable
Easier to spot in children & can be talked out of them (any stress/ trauma undergone)
Effective Solutions for good sleep
Quest mode
Learning about mental health – its importance – consequences of not maintaining it
“Seeing is Believing”: watched lots of programming on mental health
The gist of it as understood is presented below
Specific issues to be tackled
Individual & Social Problems viz. Alcohol dependence, Tobbaco, Drug intake, Mood changes, Sleep related, Unnecessary fears, Over excited, Violence
We are Psycho Somatic Beings
Mind & Body linked; we can literally think/ affirm ourselves to good health or the opposite also
Linkages to illnesses being exacerbated by negative emotions is now firmly established, infact some emotions viz. anger, hatred, jealousy, stresses, disturbances in relationships can lead to/ worsening of prevailing physical illnesses
Some diseases viz. hypertension, cardiac diseases, ulcers, asthma, diabetes, migranes, acidity etc. have a psychosomatic connect
How it started?
The question of how to realize our own full human potential & other seeing that’s there is more to you than you are ready to believe there is
Thus seeking validation from the world
The difference in potential due to the “ mind over matter”; people having so much potential losing out on life due to the “mind”.
Not knowing what goes on inside a persons head
Tried to frame a question ; closest approach being “Mental health: How to improve it?
How to be Happy & Satisfied?
SolGrow Consulting (OPC) Pvt Ltd 